arshi SS : Hamesha ~ A heartbeat away, Chapter 22

Chapter 22

In her dream Khushi Kumari Gupta was busy eating from a plate full of crispy bright orange jiebis and a high heap of steaming hot crunchy samosas. Her brows furrowed. Vaguely she registered herself dreaming.

Her last meal in Gupta house before her marriage, and even in her own dream she could not eat in peace! Buaji was shouting at her from far away. "Uff bauji humein shanti se khane do na", she grumbled and decided to sprint off with the plate to find some solitude.

Within her dream world she turned, raised her leg to run, but when it fell upon the ground beneath, the surface was astonishingly strong and firm. Somehow, warm and comforting. Could the earth have such characteristics?

She blinked open her eyes, a little disorientated. Was she in a dream within a dream?

Arnavji was right beside her, on the bed!

Buaji was still shouting outside. What in the world was happening? It was extremely hard to unravel what was happening when it was effortless to get lost in those drugging dark eyes next to her.

"tum hamesha aise soti ho?", unfazed, he questioned her casually.

(Do you always sleep this way?)

Her leg was draped across his torso. Not wasting time on blushing, Khushi retracted her leg with speed that would have ashamed even a national level sprinter. After she had successfully moved her leg off him, having nothing else to do except stare, at close quarters, into his eyes, she could not stop the heated reddening that made an appearance on her nose.

His right eyebrow was still arched high in an amused curiosity. Light as feather he flicked her nose. "Tomorrow night is going to be.. ", he paused. "Interesting". He noted with a satisfied air still eyeing her leg.

He raised himself at an angle and touched her payal, that shone resting near her ankle.

"sankadevi.. ", buaji was clearly outside the door.

With surprising agility, again, Khushi sprang up and pushed Arnavji under her blanket. Not a moment passed before buaji was upon them.

"nand kisore payali aai gayi?"

(Payal came back?)

"h..ha buaji. You go sleep. What are you doing awake at night? Kal kitna kaam hai buaji.. Do you even remember kal suhaag raat hai"..

(y..yes buaji.. tomorrow there is so much work to be done)

Hey devi maiyya what was she saying.. Khushi smacked herself on her forehead in despair. She could hear a smothered chuckle next to her. He was on her bed sharing her blanket.. Her head was reeling.

"hainn?".. Buaji's laughter boomed in the still night. Having given up controlling the events of this night Khushi could only chew her lips and listen.

"don't worry titilya hum bhi pehle bahut darat rahe ee sab baatan soch kar, par tumhre phuphaji bhi na..". Buaji was trying to sway gently, highly impossible given her heavy mass. Her hand fondled her long plait.

(Initially I was also very scared about all this, but your uncle..)

"ha..ha buaji.. Aap jake so jayiye ab.. Please..", Khushi hastened to somehow get buaji from talking further. She was mortified enough, already.

(go sleep now)

"Parmeswari it is your last night in our house. Hum sochat hainn eeha apni Payaliya aur sankadevi ke sath hi so jai rahe. Shift a little".

(I am thinking of sleeping here with you both)

Khushi went sliding towards the warm presence in her blanket, buaji had tried to sit on the edge, which basically meant she took up practically half of the bed. The bed gave a loud creak and it was buaji's turn to show her agility. "Aisan toh ee bistar humare jaisan majboot hainn, but it will be better not to take a risk".

(As such this bed is as strong as me)

Plastering a hearty kiss on the nervous girl's forehead she blessed her. "nand kisore tomorrow is your wedding..". Buaji tucked her niece in for the night. Finally, she ambled out much to someone's relief.

Khushi was alone with Arnavji. In the dark, having Arnvaji close, in her room, on her bed, felt..exciting.. That know-it-all voice in her head whispered to khushi.

When ASR pushed off the blanket he was a little exasperated with himself. He frowned.

He had accompanied Akash and Payal to Gupta house. The couple had been happy to be given a few minutes alone when ASR slipped into Khushi's room. And here he was, but what was Arnav Singh Raizada doing hiding from buaji? Covered by a blanket.

He made a movement to object to having been pushed into a rajai. One look at the girl next to him shut off all thoughts.

He was in khushi's room, on her bed. Having her close in such an intimate surrounding, was a new feeling. One he longed to get used to. She would be with him from tomorrow. The thought made him extremely happy. A sense of fierce pride washed over him. She was his.

With a gossamer touch he brushed the lock of hair that fell over her eye. She blinked, but did not move away, trusting and comfortable. He shifted closer, his hand on her waist. Damn the stupid blanket! He couldn't even see his hand as it held her..

She flowed towards him. She was soft. And exquisite. Everything about her confounded and delighted him. He longed to know every single thought that flit through her gorgeous head.

"What are you thinking?"

She answered without hesitation, her voice, the slightest of breathless, "kal se hum sath honge".

(From tomorrow we will be together)

"hamesha", he confirmed and finally succumbing to the inevitable, kissed her. Long and deep. She sighed and wriggled closer into his arms. A fresh sense of longing, a compelling desire stirred within. There was newness and a pristine sense of promise.

(Forever)

His hands moved freely, she reveled in the touch, arching towards him. Slowly loosing herself in the wonder of his touch, she moved her hands to touch too. Unfamiliar firm strong muscles that her fingers were coming to know.

"Arnavji".. came her querulous sigh.

He pulled away, even though she seemed unwilling to let go. "khushi.. main", came his a deep throated whisper. There were so many things he wanted to tell her, but words would not be enough to capture the emotion that ran in his veins.

(Khushi.. I)

Her breath was haywire, but an profound certainty was visible on her face. "hum samajhte hai", and at that moment there was no truer words. She knew his heart and all the love it held for her.

(I understand)

A hushed knock on the window startled them. Payal must be outside wanting to be let in.

He was on his way out, when he turned. Khushi sat in the middle of the colorful riot of the blanket, her hair disarray, a sad smile on her face, watching him go.

He couldn't possibly leave her looking this sad..

A devilish smirk played on his still wet lips. "Khushi sleep well. And don't forget kal humari shaag raat hai".

(it's our wedding night tomorrow)

Her eyes went wide and mouth opened equally wide.

"bye". Satisfied that sadness was replaced by all sorts of other thoughts, he made his smooth exit.

****

Khushi still had her 'haw' face on, when Payal slipped in through the door.

Their last night as young girls in Gupta house. All the myriad colors woven in their dreams were read to splash into their lives the very next day. They were getting married.

They held hand tight as they lay on their backs staring at the ceiling, unseeing. Their thoughts busy with what was to come.

"ow jeeji", Khushi had been smacked on the head with a sorry looking pillow. Rubbing her eyes, with the back of her mehendi covered hand, she sat up and gasped flabbergast. Had her room been hit by a hurricane at night?

Everything was scattered everywhere and from what she could gather buaji was claiming this was meant to be packing.

"Will you wake up please Khushi? Humein packing khatam karna hai. Then mandir jana hai and be at shantivan by noon". Payal had picked up a stack of plain chiffon sarees and was eyeing them critically, deciding if she wanted a rainbow of similar sarees in her new wardrobe.

(we have to finish packing. then leave for the mandir)

So, she missed the mischievous smile that lit her sister's face. Khushi had grabbed a fuller newer pillow and aimed it with precision at Payal.

Panting and giggling, within no time both girls had indulged in a pillow fight, much to buaji's dismay.

Garima was taking care of the preparations outside while buaji had appointed herself to get the girls ready on time. If her neighbors so much as stepped into this room they would have realised how incompetent Madhumatiji was in getting her nieces ready. Still, she did not have the heart to break their fun.

Breathless, her sides aching with the giggling, Khushi suddenly recollected how she had taught even lavayaji the joy of a good pillow fight. Of course, it would have been way more fun if, like in the movies, the pillows burst open and feathers floated all over. That never happened in Khushi's room. buaji's stupid sturdy pillows! Khushi glared at the them.

After buaji had shouted again and got the girls moving, Khushi rushed to find the trinket box that had the most precious of her belongings. She peeped into it.

A leaf he had pulled out from her hair, a sequin from the saree he had gifted her, his ma's letter; all lay safe within. She quickly placed it next to her devi maiyya. Even if she forgot all her other things, these two were the ones she needed with her.

****

He was looking at the roses surrounded by verdant bushes. It would have been considered to be early in the morning by most, but already there a great deal of excitement and noise. He didn't care. He was looking at the roses.

"Chote.. Chote"

A lady with a warm smile and weary eyes made her way across the damp lawn. Her silk saree was half in gold and half in saphire blue. She held the pleats a little above her ankle, afraid of getting the edges spoiled. Her hand had gold bangles almost all the way up to her elbows.

"ma"!

He called out to her in excitement. "dekho the plant you were watering everyday has finally sprouted a bud. A red rose ma".

With a serene smile she viewed the rose which was taking its first few breaths. A few dew drops glistened on its velvety outer petals.

"ab Chalo Chote. It is your wedding today".

Her hand was extended out towards him, beckoning. He wanted to catch it, but couldn't seem to get to it.

"Ma..", he panicked.

She, however, smiled reassuringly, stepped forward and caught his hand in her hers. "I'm here chote. With you".

ASR flung off the covers. Wide awake with a clear head, he settled against the dark ebony rosewood headboard of his low rise bed. He reached for his blackberry and with a strange eagerness dialed her number ..

"Haaloo", came her trilling voice from across.

"Hi", he sounded husky to his own ears. A mixture of slumber and love caused his voice to take this heady tone.

"Arnavji"

"Arnav", he patiently corrected. His grin became more pronounced imagining her state of discomfiture at the other end.

"Kya kar ri ho Khushi?"

(What are you doing?)

Was this feeling called missing someone? A solemn thought entered his mind. He missed ma and it always made him choke with a sense of unbearable sorrow that he had endured for ages. It had become part of him. Could missing someone actually make you feel joy as well? He had no idea how Khushi managed to make his insides light and hopeful. Even ma had reached him in his dream today, not melted away unreachable like always.

"Arnavji are you even listening.. I asked.. Do you like pillow fighting?"

"What the? Kya kaha tum?"

(What did you say?)

"uff laad governor 5 baar hum yehi sawaal puch chuke hai.. I will come and explain abhi hum rakhte hai". He was about to disconnect when her querulous whisper reached him. 

"Arnavji I miss you". And she cut the call.

(5 times I have asked the same question. now am keeping the phone)

Now, he was definitely smiling, widely. He decided, that though missing her made him happy, he would still prefer her to be right next to him. And she would be, starting today. His heart seemed to indulge a funny sort of leap.

He put on his most serious look and tried to ignore the silly uncontrollable nonsense taking place in his heart.

It was time for his regular jog, and he would give Aman a call and talk about the consignment of pillows.. Huh? .. Did he just say pillows in his head? Dammit.. Why was she thinking of pillow fights?

No, nothing was regular today.

The austere Shantivan halls had been decked with flowers. His solitary jog was blocked by workers setting up points where fire crackers would take place in the night. Even OP had transformed from plain colored kurtas into a bright shocking red kurta.

Regular? He might as well forget that words exists.. Though his face had no hint of mirth, his heart continued its own sprint and jiggle.. Khushi.. It seemed to utter with each beat..

****

Anjali lay in a half drowsy state, her head resting on her grandmother's lap. She was relieved that sleep had seemed to dull the hollow sensation inside her. Nani's hand continued patting her in that soothing motion. She debated on waking up fully, or resisting the demands of reality for a few more welcome minutes.

Nani sat humming a gentle tune. A half forgotten lullabye that Anjali's ma would also sing. Most probably, ma had learnt it from her mother, the very lady humming the song now.

Not too long after, the door burst open and in walked Manorama Raizada. It was hardly dawn and mamiji was still in her printed flowery satin nightgown. She had meant to tip toe in it seemed, but seeing Anjali's eye open she plopped down comfortably at the edge of the bed.

"Anjali bitiya.. Baal mein hawt oilj lagane ke khatir hum ee tel lai rahe.. You bhil bej lubhing it.."

(I brought this hot oil for you hair. You will love it)

"Nani do you remember how ma would put oil on my hair and tie it into two plaits when I was sick?", Anjali turned to look at her grandmother who nodded gently at her.

"Such a normal thing to do..", her voice trailed off wistful.

"no noj Anjali bitiya.. Sirf tel naahi.. Aaj ishaampooing bhi karike pari.. Ebhening ma too tooj shaadi hai eeha.. Makupiya toh thik tarah se karike pari".

(not only oil.. today you need to shampoo too. There are two two weddings in the evening, the makeup has to be good)

Anjali sat up to humour her mami, letting her apply the oil on her hair, while Nani went to take a look at the commotion outside. Om Prakashji's shrill superior shouting, interspersed with bouts of equally shrill laughter, was evident even through the heavy doors .

The pressure from mami's finger's actually felt heavenly on Anjali's head. Mami chattered away happily on which fire crackers she thought were her favourite, Anjali let herself feel nothing except the heat of the oil against her scalp.

The door opened and OP walked in with a tray. ASR followed close.

"di breakfast", his voice was tentative.

"Om Parkaas eet eej time phar my gilas aaph orange juice pileej.. No issugar.. Only ice", Manorma rushed after him shouting her instructions in the most imperious of tones.

(it is time for my glass of orange juice)

"chote ye toh..", Anjali looked at the tray of food.

(this is)

"ha di. Mathura aaloo puri. I asked nani to make it for us. Here have some", he placed a heapful of food onto a plate for his di.

She accepted the plate and took a bite savouring the taste of the familiar security of nani's cooking. She saw ASR eating a small helping of the food too. His measured small bites, plate was left tidy as he wiped every crumb off it in is usual perfection.

"Chote its your big day today. One I waited for far too long. I always wanted to be there for you. Aaj ma hoti toh.."

(If ma was here today)

"Di aaj mere dream mein ma came. She was fine di. Aur aap.. aap mere liye sab kuch ho. We have each other. Sab thik hai di." ASR had put his plate aside. Earnestness in his demeanor was evident. He meant every word.

(you are everything to me. It's all okay)

Di heard his words and felt a weight lift off her shoulders. Her listless eyes gained back some of that twinkle. "chote if I mean all that to you, tum mere liye kya kar sakte ho?"

(what can you do for me)

"anything di.. Tell me", came his wholehearted reply.

With a straight face she responded."You know there is one thing that will make me happy my dear chote bhaiya. Wear the sherwani I brought you.. Please".

He shrugged, thought his eyes crinkled at the ends, giving away his delighted mood. "Fine".

"excellent. do you know I matched it to Khushi bhabhi's lehenga, but it has something to your taste as well. Black and red".

"Now don't go all poetic and say I will look like the smouldering coal or something like that di. You chose it. I'll wear it", his lips were pursued, but stretched at the end, controlling a smile.

Anjali clapped her hands in delight. Her papad ka tukda was getting married.

She had spent hours dreaming of this day. Boring Shyamji with the details, the never ending plans. Shyamji.. She breathed in deeply.

****

Arnav Singh Raizada was wearing a dapper grey cotton shirt. His waistcoat was of a darker grey hand woven khadi cloth. The clean cut could leave no one in doubt that the best fashion house had its hand in this master piece. With this casual elegance, a day old stubble on his face, hair glistening with the remains of his morning shower, he concentrated on his plants.

There were sunflowers in bloom in the pots. All they needed was a sprinkle of water. Meticulously he watered the plants.

He could hear mamaji shouting instructions at some worker outside. He was torn in amusement at how excited everyone was, but his thoughts lingered over di. He was worried for her. The anguish had not left her eyes. It bothered him a lot.

He moved to the rows of roses. Yes his garden finally had roses in bloom.. The fragrance wafted towards him soothing his spirits.

Now, it seemed mami was in a fit about something. He wondered if he should go look. Nah, he would leave it to others to deal with her.

When his phone range he guessed it would be Aman. Luckily someone managed to stay sane in all this. It would do ASR good to discuss some actual work. However, when Aman actually started speaking, ASR had to groan.

"What the! Aman are you out of your mind? You were coming here and Mohan was driving out and you both managed to bang into each other! Yes.. Yes I know its only a scratch on both the cars .. and you both were distracted, but who told you to run errands for the wedding? Shouldn't atleast one of us be working in the office?.. Okay fine, get on with whatever nani and di have instructed you to do."

He disconnected the call. Apparently, Aman preferred selecting which sweets would be served tonight, than looking over stock statements today. Okay, so even Aman was not untouched by this wedding madness, ASR thought wryly.

A moment later some more madness made its appearance. Akash and NK walked up arguing in loud tones.

"bhai tell NK bhai to give me back my shoes", Akash complained. He was barefoot and clearly sulking. NK was gloating, a pair of sneakers dangling in his hand.

"Nannav main aise nai kar sakta. You see I know everything.. joote churana ek kasam hai". NK stretched himself on the garden chair.

(stealing shoes is a promise)

"Rasam", ASR corrected him smoothly. His eyes caught Akash.

(ceremony)

The unfortunate groom tried to reason with his cousin. "The rasam is for the girl's side. They have to try to steal our shoes, not our own brother. NK bhai..", he was exasperated.

"na na Akash. Itna fun rasam kasam whatever main unke liye chor dun? Tum ghayal ho.. crazy.. Tum mujhe paise do nahi toh main tumhare shoes ko..". He looked around deciding what the most effective threat would be. He spotted the glass of juice that OP had left for ASR.

(no no Akash. leave all this fun for them? you are hurt.. crazy.. give me money otherwise to your shoes I will..)

"nai toh main tumahre shoes mein ye juice daal dunga". Nk declared as he picked the glass of orange juice that OP had left for ASR.

(I'll pour this juice onto yours shoes)

ASR wasn't paying attention anymore, he was laughing. His cousins stared in amazement at the sight, but ASR was staring at a girl blowing her nose admitting to have poured mango jooce into his shoes.

A normal day? hell no! Arnav Singh Raizada was getting married to Khushi Kumari Gupta.

****

Internet friends, college friends and best friend

All day long I was miserable and quite literally drove Lazywiz crazy with my dejection because I could not write. I had to write. I was desperate to write, but I could not find inspiration.

Then at midnight as I was watching Season 5 Episode 18 of Gray's anatomy titled Stand By Me I suddenly found a reason to post this. A man with a beastlike shell of a face awaits to have his face reconstructed by plastic surgery. He needs to get proper post op care and has no family. So guess who show up to help him out?

His internet friends. They have chatted all through these years about their mutual passion around orchids. And these friends have flown out from different place to Seattle to be with him.

I haven't met my internet friends, but they are part of me now. An Indian TV serial an online forum would lead me to writing and becoming friends with a group of people I have not seen face to face, but who are part of me everyday. And Indi di .. an important reason I write and continue to write. My friends... 

Of course there are those 5 college friends and 2 school friends. On whats app and gmail who are still the ones that make me want to talk and never fail to bring a smile and exhale a sigh.

This episode also has McDreamy all teary eyed and sad. He is broken and doubting himself, but I hope it is a happy ending. I really like him. And I love him and Meredith together. 

Just they way he looks at her. Actually, his wistful look as he stares at anyone, the fact that he is slighter older mature but still a romantic and the fact that he is intelligent and capable makes him irresistible.

And finally since am writing I am no longer tense and upset. All in all a good day. 

Today is friendships day. Just another day when I got a hundred and more reasons to know am lucky to be living with my best friend. Happy friendship's day my lazywiz! 

I was intelligent that very first day in college when I decide I would follow you whichever corridor you lead me to.

arshi SS: Hamesha ~ a heartbeat away, chapter 21

Chapter 21

Arnav Singh Raizada strode towards his di's room. In his mind he had painfully relived Anjali's blank stare and listless words uncountable times since the denouement of Shyam Manohar Jha.

He paused in front of her door. 

Right in front of the door Akash and Payal were sitting cross legged on the floor with anxious expressions on their faces. They looked young. Then again, they were young. Though ASR himself was most probably only a few years elder to them, what he lacked in numbers he had made up in his experiences.

Deviyani Raizada might be the head of the family in matters of spirit and in ethics, but in deeds and actions her eldest grandson had donned the mantle of the grown up who looked after everyone. Even in this instant, when his head was a dark dense jumble of the past and the not so past, ASR continued to think about his family. 

Whether it was this sole focus of ensuring everyone got through the night that kept him in control of himself or was it the other way around, if asked, no doubt he would not have been able to determine for himself. There was no difference. He would be the one to make sure everyone got through. bas. And there was no question that he would make sure everyone was fine.

Payal started to rise seeing him, but he gestured her not to. The girl looked exhausted enough as is. He liked Payal. Her steady loyal spirit, sensible attitude, grace and firmness of opinion would make her an excellent partner for Aakash. 

Even though his primary focus lay beyond the closed door ASR was looking out for everyone. That is what he did.

"di had calmed down a bit bhai, but wanted some time alone so we came outside", Akash informed ASR.

ASR nodded, before noting in a calm voice as he pushed open the door, "I want to talk to her".



Anjali had thought about changing out of her light pink net saree. However, as she stood in front of her closet looking at her sarees she felt silly. What did one wear after your world had just crashed apart? What color suits you when everyone accuses your husband of cheating on you? What length of sleeves were right for your blouse? With a hysteric sob she had given up on the idea of changing.

She was still all dressed up for the engagement party that had been meant to take place. Dazzling chandelier earrings, rows of carefully arranged bangles in varying shades of pink, in varying thickness, a diamond studded choker, all adorned her. Her most festive addition was perhaps the most tragic of all.

A thick long line of vermillion red from where her hair parted on the forehead straight upwards, till it got lost in the thick black hair. She loved to put sindoor this way, in copious quantity, during functions and festivals. Her choice was expected in a way, after all she loved being married. She loved being married to Shyamji.

"di aap thik hain? di talk to me", her little brother sat near her feet at the edge of the bed.

(di are you okay?)

He had always been strong. Even when she thought she had left the past behind, she had needed support, while her chote had provided support to all. Her chote..

"please", his voice was barely above a whisper.

What she had been resolutely trying to ignore in the past hours had to be finally faced. Buaji, Khushi bhabhi..and most importantly her chote.. All couldn't be wrong.. still..

Anjali raised her hand and stroked his cheek, "hum thik hai chote. I just..", her voice wobbled and trailed away.

(I am all right)

Was she strong enough? She wasn't .. She couldn't be.. Not without Shyamji.. Her Shyamji.

ASR grasped her shivering wrist and held it firmly against his cheek. "di I am sorry. I didn't know. I couldn't do anything even after I came to know. I.. I failed you..".  All the agony in him came tumbling out at the hope of acceptance in her tone.

She had known Shyamji had changed.. When exactly she couldn't say for sure.. but he had changed..

"nahi chote. You didn't. You did tell me, tried to warn me, but I chose not to see. didn't want to believe you. I  still don't. I wish there was some other explanation", bereft, her eyes wandered to the framed photograph. She and Shyamji were posing for the camera, on their first wedding anniversary. 

Had it been three years already? What would she do when the day of her anniversary came this year?

"di", ASR's voice was hushed, still laced with urgency. When he was sure he had her attention he continued, "di Shyam", he swallowed, trying to form the sentences.

Then he rushed into it, "he had been doing all sorts of wrong. galat. Aman found out about his money laundering.. And Khushi".

Khushi Kumari Gupta's name lay suspended in the air. 

Arnav loved her to distraction. She was the girl for whom Shyamji had been willing to cheat on Anjali. Anjali's head hurt terribly, all she wanted was to curl into her chote's lap and sleep. When she would wake this nightmare would have ended. 

No.. It would not end.. The pain had to be faced..

"Shyam", soft, laced with sadness Anjali said the name. "I remember now this was Khushi bhabhi's", she paused, not wishing to go ahead with the sentence. "this was buaji's paying guest's name. I am not blind chote. hum jante hai jo tum sab keh rahe ho falls into place lekin hum.."

(I know what you all are saying, but I)

She leant forward, wanting his support. Placing her head on his shoulder she continued, "about the money also I think I have had a suspicion for long, just I chose to ignore it. hum dekhna nai chahte the. You know, nothing else mattered to me, I have been so happy these past few years".

(I didn't want to see)

She choked at the words. Her body shook as she tried to hold back the sobs.

"di aap mat socho. We'll find a way. I am here. I'll be right next to you", he sounded very young, his voice raw with emotion. 

(don't think of it.)

He had promised her the same fourteen years ago and made sure it was actually all okay.

"chote if anyone could have made everything back to the way it was, it would be you, but not this time", she said looking directly at him with infinite love in her trusting eyes.

He laid his head onto her lap. They sat that way for a long time till a small smile appeared on Anjali's face.

"And why will you be next to me? Kal hum bahut busy hai aur tum bhi. tumhari aur Akash ki shadi hain".

(tomorrow I am very busy and you too. It is your and Akash's wedding)

"lekin di"

(but di)

"I won't lie chote. Not to you. There is a gaping hole in my heart right now. Even though specially for the past year Shyamji has been distant and I have felt lonely at times I still can't quite comprehend how he could do something like this. humare Shyamji. humara dimag sach samajh raha hai par dil maan nahi raha".

(my Shyamji. my brain understands the truth but my heart refuses to accept it)

"di we will face it together". There was a sincere promise in him. As if with sheer force of will he would erase all tragic memories from di'd broken heart.

"ha chote. lekin is baar hum dukho ko humari khushiyan nahin cheenane denge. You have to get married".

(yes, but this time we will not let troubles snatch away our happiness)


****


Akash looked at the girl sitting next to him.  Her usual serene face was overcast with anxiety. Akash found his heart overwhelm with emotions for the girl who worried deeply for his family. 

He has not old fashioned at all, but he liked the fact that she cared. He liked that she had a quiet reserved air, but when she smiled it reached and lit up her beautiful eyes.

Payal was in a fiery orange lehenga that had sparse silver thread work. Her sunny yellow dupatta of a shimmery light fabric was in disarray. Since the time he had joined his bhai in the fashion house business his love for designs, cloth, colors had grown.  He reached out to feel the material against his fingers.

His abrupt movement had startled Payal, but his hand firmly slid along her dupatta till it reached her hand. His fingers interwove with hers. "The orange brings out your strength. You seem to glow with it".

The smile he had missed made a shy appearance back on her face. She squeezed his hand tightly, relieved that all the chaos of the past few hours had not soured their relation.  She had grown to expect Akash's quiet, placid loving. Seeing him in a serious mood had made her nervous.  Perhaps this was marriage, she mused, where you saw the one you love in all his different moods.

They got a few minutes to enjoy this shy peaceful companionship before NK was upon them. Payal tried to move her hand away, but unwillingly to let her go Akash shifted closer to her. He had managed to effectively screen the hands that still held on to each other.

"main di ka haal check karne ke liye aaya", NK announced.

(I came to check how di is)

"bhai is with her", Akash informed him, hoping he would leave soon, so Akash could go back to getting to spend some time alone with Payal.

However, it appeared that NK had no intention of leaving. He remained towering, smiling loopily, over the couple sitting on the floor.

"tum dono ki chori kamaal hai Akash Payal bhabhiii", he declared in a sing song loud voice.

(your concealment is great)

Akash immediately pulled back his hand, while Payal flushed.

"chori?",  the nervous lover stammered.

(concealment?)

"ha Akash..chori.. Ladka ladki.. Couple",  NK gestured excitedly with his hands pointing at the couple in front of him.

(yes concealment.. boy girl..)

"aapka matlab.. jodi.. chori nai NK bhaiya", Payal  laughed. She sounded so wonderful that Akash just had to reach out for her hand again. If NK got to see, then let him. He would hold Payal's hand right now.

(you mean couple)

The door to di's room opened and ASR walked out. Akash's hand again flew out of Payal's.


****

Deviyani Raizada was holding out branches with fresh leaves for lakshmiji to munch on. Watching Lakshmiji go about in her usual way brought a sense of calm and was helping to clear the worried old lady's thoughts. Even then her shoulders were hunched over bearing a heavy burden of the past.

She would make sure Anjali bitiya got past this tough time. Her Nani was right there with her..

"saasuma hum keh det hai hum sab Anjali bitiya ke taking carej kari hai par kal agar do do nayi bahuriyan shantivan ma enteringj naahi ki tab ee original bahuriya bhil also leabhingj shantivan".

(I am telling you this we will all take care of Anjali bitiya but if tomorrow two new daughter in laws don't enter shantivan then this original daughter in law will also leave Shantivan)

Manorama Raizada, the self proclaimed original daughter-in-law of the shantivan household and burst into the room and attempted to convince the head of the family.

Unknown to her Deviyani Raizada shoulders perked up a bit. She bit back the hint of smile and sternly replied, "there was no question of the wedding not happening Manorma".

"dekhiye saasuma hum.. Oh.. Hmm.. Okaay hello hi bye bye", not expecting such a smooth resolution manorma Raizada walked away to share this news with her husband. In her version of the incident she was already deciding upon adding a little color and excitement.

(look here sasuma)



ASR was in his room When his Nani came to him. "chote I need you to take me somewhere".

"ha nani", he quickly got up and picked his SUV keys.

"where do you want to go?", he asked when they were seated in his car.

"we are going to LakshmiNagar. hum khushi aur Payal bitiya ke ghar walo se milna chahte hai. And you will come with me. We will have the wedding tomorrow chote, ranta bitiya's one child has had her heart broken par hum unke chote ki khushi ghar lake rahenge".

(I want to meet Khushi and Payal's family... I will bring chotes happiness home)

Tears has pooled into the wrinkled, but sharp eyes and a few spilt over when her grandson reached to squeeze her tiny hand in his strong young hand.

 "Here, I think you need this. I am very proud of you chote hamesha.. Aur ab thora hasiye aapke bhya hone wala hai".

(now smile a little, you are about to get married) 

She handed him a small velvet box and then showering her blessings stoked his forehead.


****


There was a subdued atmosphere in the Gupta house. Even the vociferous buaji sat silent, her head tied with a red and white checked cotton hand towel. Garima was wringing her hands, tensed about the showdown in Shantivan.  She knew if Khushi's babuji was able to voice his opinion he would have insisted that the truth be told. Yes, Garima was proud of her daughters, but also worried for not just them, but the sweet Anjali bitiya as well.

Khushi came and handed a round of freshly brewed tea to everyone. Buaji and her amma were quick to notice how forlorn she looked.

"khoosi come sit with us, while we wait for your jiji to return from Shantivan", Garima sweetly coaxed her daughter, knowing some company would do her good tonight.

"ha titiliya aur eeha baith kar jara humara sir bhi dabai diyo nand kisore", buaji chimed in as well, eager to have Khushi chattering away as usual.

(sit here and press my forehead a little)

Placing her cup on the table Khushi rushed to her buaji and with both her hands pressed on her temples with a little too much vigor.

"haye re nand kisore.. Sankadevi will you make my headache worse.. Kono jarurat nahi .. Nand kisore.. I am fine", buaji bellowed.

(no need)

Giggling Khushi picked up her cup of tea, two biscuits from the plate and went to sit outside under the stars. She felt like spending some time with her amma babuji tonight.

"devi maiyya what must be happening there right now? I wish.."

A car had halted in front of their gate. A car distinctly so outrageously out of place in the congested lane of Shantinagar that there was no question who was inside it.

Too dazed to do anything but gape with an open mouth Khushi just sat and watched while naniji and her Arnavji stepped out of the car.

When naniji reached the Gupta house steps good sense finally prevailed and Khushi called out to buaji.


"Khushi bitiya aap baithiya eeha. I will go inside myself".

Deviyani Raizada was very fond of Khushi. From the first day she had met this cheerful, cultured, warm hearted girl she had gained a place in her heart. Anyone who was liked by lakshmiji was immediately placed in Deviyani Raizada's good books. And Khushi was not just loved by Lakshmiji, but by chote as well. 

With a smile she entered the house, trying to calm down the excited buaji, who was frantically trying to clean up the Gupta drawing room which was highly unprepared for the arrival of such a guest. It was quite a feat that Deviyani Raizada managed to show no surprise at a towel tied around Madhumatiji's head. No doubt where Khushi got her endearing.. what did madhumatiji call it?.. ha sanka.. 

"hum eeha khud aana chahte the. To tell you all there is nothing to worry. Your daughters will come to our house as our daughters tomorrow. Shaadi mein kauno badha nahi aayegi. Shaadi ke chal pahal se Anjali bitiya ka bhi thora man lag jayega". In her usual forthright manner she eased all worries.

(I wanted to come here myself. There will be no obstacle in this marriage. the hustle bustle of marriage will keep Anjali engages as well).

"eeha aapne humari chinta door kar di aur ooha nand kisore Arnav bitwa humari parmeswari ka bhi chehra khilkhila denge", buaji was wiping away big fat drops of tears with her towel, the same one that was bound on her head. 

(Here you have rid out worries and there Arnav will make our Khushi happy as well)

All the elders looked on at their children sitting on the steps outside. How young they were! How much in love.. How much happiness lay ahead of them.



****


Outside ASR  sat down on the steps.

"khushi apna muh band karo and sit", he had an intimate air of saying these things, with his lips pursed, as if it was a thrilling secret only meant for her ears. 

(close your mouth)

She sat down and started talking gaining momentum as she went along. "Arnavji how is di? wo thik hai? aap thik hai? Did you talk to her? You know I wanted to talk to you, but.."

(is she all right? are you?)

"Do you ever get tired of talking?", he was genuinely contemplating on her ability to talk non stop.

"nahi. In two things I never tire. Eating and talking, but then if you have you phone in your ear then even you keep talking.. Oh talking nahi..iscolding.."

Just having him in front of her was making her light headed. A few minutes back,  she had felt drained and anxious, and now even though she was worried about a million different things her shoulders felt lighter. It was like the rain clouds had parted and the sun had come out, which was silly because it was evening and dark now. 

"arnavji aapki amma", she asked in a small voice, hesitating to broach the subject, but longing to reach out to the aching man.

He went completely still for a second. She forgot to breath in that second.

She didn't want him to brood. All she wanted was to share and soothe.

"Her husband cheated on her. Chaudah saal ka tha jab meri ma ne .. She committed suicide".

(I was 14 years old when my mother)

He did not want to break down now. He wanted to distract himself, and her loving touch would only weaken his hold on himself. He took a moment to gulp down the bitter memories. She had moved closer to him, her slender body radiating a comforting warmth. 

His Khushi.. Today she knew all his secrets.. Today she was a part of all of him..

"by the way I have something for you", he took out a ring from his pocket.

Her heart had leapt, but she hastily demurred, "par Arnavji with di so sad how can I" ?

"Don't fuss Khushi. Apna hath do mujhe", his face was taut.

(give me your hand)

In a flash a sunset at the mandir she remembered. Khadoos laad governor had been scaring her then as well, even though he had been insisting on bandaging her bleeding finger.

"humein nahi dena hai", she turned away from him, and walked some step apart.

(I don't want to give)

"don't talk to me in that tone. I brought this specially for you. here..", his expression was sour as he concentrated on the task at hand, but within seconds the sourness had transformed to infinite tenderness.

It was unnaturally dark, only a full moon and infinite stars shone on them. The wind had picked up speed.  Her dupatta joyously fluttered with the breeeze.

He had taken her hand and slipped on the ring. His ring.

The ring had a slender platinum band, which was cool against Khushi's skin. All the heat came from ASR's fingers as they slid the ring onto her finger. On the platinum band were three clusters of small brilliantly cut diamonds. As a whole they sparkled in tandem, but each had a rhythm of its own on which they individually glittered.

She held still, his hand still holding hers. 

He raised his eyes and looked at her. Only it wasn't just one look, it was drenched and dripping in an infinite ocean of emotions.  Turbulent. Stormy. Placid. Deep. Of love, trust, friendship and a vow of hamesha. His eyes were saying it all.

"di was with me when I brought this. I thought the stones would remind you of stars. Three stars. Tumhare amma babuji aur meri ma hamesha tumhare sath honge. Khushi main .. I love you.". A compelling vulnerability had seeped into his words.

(your father mother, my mother will always be with you)

He had said it again. Calmly. Without shouting.  Was devi maiyya listening?

She wanted to giggle in happiness or cry because she felt overwhelmed or throw her arms around him, but there was something that she wanted to do even more.

"Arnavji hum bhi aapse I love you dammit", she just had to whisper. And though her voice quivered a bit, her smile was shy, and her face had a disarming honesty. 

Her words were poetry, because he felt like bursting into a song, or dancing or laughing or doing something insane. He could kiss her, but then he might not be able to stop, and he was definitely not in a mood to stop. So he settled for a close second.

"hmm.. We'll have to work on what you call me. Arnav is just fine. And you can start practicing from tomorrow. Tumhe yaad hai na, kal humari suhaag raat hai Khushi".

(you do remember, don't you? tomorrow is our wedding night)

And he winked. An outrageous flamboyant wink.

She could not believe her eyes or her ears. Dream Arnav..ji.. And the Arnavji in front of her had intermingled into one.

She blushed a deep shade of scarlet. Unsure of how to react she bit her lower lip and fumbled with her dupatta while in her heart a now persistent pleasant cascade of music rose.

dhak dhak dhak dhak..



****